Anxiety

anx·i·e·ty

aNGˈzīədē/

noun

1. a feeling of worry, nervousness, or unease, typically about an imminent event or something with an uncertain outcome.

   "he felt a surge of anxiety"

It's been a year since i felt such anxiousness.  Not ever since I entered the workforce, or ever since I completed all the exams and assignment due dates. That being said, the last time I felt such, I remembered was the day I interviewed for the current company I worked for.  Of course, the same was experienced for all other interviews I attended before this.

And tonight, the feeling strikes again.  That uneasiness, that nauseous + stomachache feeling, they're all back. I'm going to do something I've never done before -  21km half-marathon for the first time ever.  Heck, I've never even ran a fun run or a 10km marathon before, and straight away, shot towards 21km?  I'm definitely doomed.  To top it off, it starts at 3am in the midnight under the chilly night and somehow-feel-like-it-will-rain weather?? This is definitely not good. 

But then, I remembered a quote : "If you want something you never had, you'll have to start doing something you've never done".  So there, this might be a good chance for me to start "exploring" what I've never done before and start doing it/them to achieve something I've never achieved before.

Wish me luck people!  Let's see if I can bring back that finisher medal & brag!!

p/s : nope, writing all these out doesn't ease the anxiety at all.  not even a tiny little bit.  and my hands are kind of trembling by the time I reach here....